Back home from Afghanistan, at last.

Now that I am back, I miss it.

I know everyone is expecting pictures, but I only have a few. You don’t go strolling in Kabul, if you leave the house you follow a straight line from A to B, except when roadblocks force you to make a detour. Whenever I had the chance to be out, I was filming, so I apologize for disappointing everyone.

I loved the monochrome color scheme in Afghanistan, all the shades of browns and beiges, speckled with the occasional green, the color of Islam. I love the sensibility of the people towards each other - granted I am spared from understanding the less pleasant comments. I love the physicality of men with men and women with women, but the country is very deprived of co-ed affection. After three weeks in Kabul, I found myself staring at a waiter, who was wearing particularly tight pants. I couldn’t keep my gaze from wandering downwards with every order – not because I was so smitten, simply because I was hungry for any visual clue of physical connection or intimacy.

The only physical ‘action’ you get in abundance are security pat-downs.

There are police checkpoints everywhere, in addition to roadblocks and security barriers. After almost four weeks in my hotel, I still don’t know what the façade looks like, because it’s barricaded with cement blocks and sand bags. It became normal to see as many guns as people, or to wait at the entrance of a public building while our security guard checked in his handgun. I, a pacifist at heart, got used to staring at guns and being physically close to them without even blinking.

Back in NY, I find life on the street almost banal.

How strange it feels. We always think we know who we are, our interests, convictions and character traits, yet so much depends on our environment. I had the same epiphany when I moved from Berlin to New York. Once confronted with a new environment, I got confused about who I was and half of my principles with the attached responses weren’t valid or important anymore. I had to allow myself to be taken over by new insights and beliefs and discovered a whole new side of me.
Now I let myself drift into new experiences every time I travel.

In Mongolia, I always wish I could bring the kids to the States, just for a little while, so they too would understand that half of their issues are significant, yet definitely not final.

I guess I have to train them all to become cinematographers, so they can travel, while working, while rediscovering themselves within an ever-changing world.

How lucky I am!

On to the next …….